The responsible parent is the best arbitrator in deciding what’s best for the family. Disallowing divorce when a spouse hinders a healthy home life undermines the very purpose of marriage and violates God’s covenant to humanity by entrapping the family into an untenable situation. The author provides answers to these questions.

What is the duty of a parent?
A parent must create a stable family by setting firm rules, and then go out and earn a living. A dysfunctional partner makes this impossible because parental authority is being undermined. One pillar supporting the structure is caving in, causing the house to list to one side. The children take advantage of the weak pillar and gravitate to the path of least resistance. Without correction, the house will collapse.

What do counselors say?
Christian counselors try to unite couples, thinking that therapy will restore the marriage. “Divorce is taboo,” they say, “it’s not supposed to happen.” This works well if the problems are mild but giving advice on interior decoration is inappropriate when the house is collapsing.

Is outside counsel always right?
No. Insisting that divorce is bad and encouraging couples to stay in a dysfunctional marriage can be damaging as I have seen in my home. It’s wonderful if a marriage can be saved, but when my family collapsed under its own weight, I realized that I had waited too long.

How does society view marriage and the family?
To secular folks, marriage is convenience, a social vessel in which to navigate. When the relationship fails, the couple splits up and regroups. Religion mandates that a marriage be permanent with no exit. I view marriage as the foundation on which to build a family, with parental responsibility to dissolve the union if internal discord causes harm.

What does a single parent need?
Recognition! Most single parents work harder than moms and dads from intact families but get little recognition. God sees their labor and will send relief in time. I encourage folks to support single parents by putting an arm around them and say, “We appreciate what you do; keep up the good work!”

What should the “ex” do after a divorce?
Not everyone is blessed with a healthy mind and the Bible teaches to look after the disadvantaged. Supporting a needy “ex” outside marriage sends a strong message to the children to care for others. My wife would have done all in her power to escape the debilitating bipolar disease.

Does single parenting add to juvenile problems?
While statistics shows more problems with children from single-parent homes than intact families, the information can be misleading because it does not address the cause of the divorce. A marriage can only succeed if both partners are fair. Character flaws of the parent(s), and not divorce, are contributing factors to juvenile delinquencies.